Posted in Books, Entertainment

R.I.P. It or Ship It: Fruits Basket Edition

To the anonymous reader who typed “fruits basket ship or rip” into search terms to find my blog: what a GENIUS idea.

Do you mind if I use it?

Because I would LOVE to produce that type of quality content.

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Ground Rules

I limited this round to characters I felt comfortable shipping (i.e., NOT THE PARENTS) and/or cared about in some fashion.

I also didn’t pick an even number of characters, so one of them WILL end up alone…just like Momiji.

Don’t be mad, it’s canon.

Also, for shipping’s sake, all characters have been aged-up and considered bi/pan.

I am examining personality dynamics, not canon possibilities.

Them’s the rules.

[WARNING: SOME SPOILERS INEVITABLE]

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Ship 1: Ritsu x Hanajima

 

AKA Anxiety Monkey meets Goth Girl

I don’t really see this working out.

It’s too much of a contrast between Ristu’s high anxiety and Hanajima’s unflappable hostility.

I could see Hanajima going out of her way to exacerbate Ritsu’s uncertainty, sort of like Shigure would in the same situation.

No, I don’t see a romance blossoming here.

VERDICT: R.I.P. IT

 

Ship 2: Kagura x Hatsuharu

 

AKA Rage Boar meets Beware the Nice Punks

Huh.

Setting aside my distaste for Kagura, this dynamic might work.

Hatsuharu has proved himself a good foil for sharp tempers.

At times, he provokes a reaction.

Other times, though, he gladly soothes and comforts the restless soul.

He could probably talk Kagura down.

And Kagura could rile Hatsuharu up when he’s too passive to defend himself.

I don’t think Kagura would dare hit Hatsuharu.

I’m a little worried about Kagura’s abuse and the violence of Hatsuharu’s Black Mode.

Aaaaghghgh I tentatively approve this relationship in hopes that it works out better than Kyo x Kagura, AKA the worst ship (among others.)

VERDICT: SHIP IT

 

Ship 3: Hiro x Kisa

 

AKA Stubborn Lil’ Ram meets Sad Tiger

OF COURSE I PICK A CANON SHIP.

I have to examine my feelings about this pairing in EARNEST.

I don’t LOVE Hiro’s belief that he must protect Kisa.

I do UNDERSTAND it, though.

Pre-character development, he’s pretty awful.

Post-character development, I can dig it.

He makes Kisa happy, so…whatever.

VERDICT: SHIP IT

 

Ship 4: Akito x Ayame

 

AKA Vengeful God meets Trickster Snake

Hahahahahaha.

Hahahahahaha.

NEVER.

This ship partly mirrors Akito’s canon ship with Shigure, another flamboyant trickster.

Ayame proves MUCH more exuberant.

I have a hard enough time getting behind Akito x Shigure.

I can’t support a pairing with a character who out-Shigures Shigure.

Also, I KNOW Akito develops, but…THE POWER DYNAMIC.

Can’t. Hate it.

VERDICT: R.I.P. IT

 

Ship 5: Uotani x Machi

 

AKA Tough Girl meets Still Waters Get Angry

Hmmm…

I’d like to think that the two will bond once Machi starts expressing her rage.

Both have a temper (though Machi tries to hide hers.)

Both care more than they let on.

Both display surprising thoughtfulness.

Both are fairly excellent at giving gifts.

I like this.

VERDICT: SHIP IT

 

Ship 6: Tohru x Kakeru

 

AKA Pure Snowflake meets Wacky Jokester

Canon-wise, this ship can’t happen for plot reasons.

DYNAMIC-WISE…

…I really like this pairing!

Kakeru indulges in the fun kind of teasing and conceives numerous ridiculous games that Tohru would like to take part in.

Couldn’t you just see them fawning over the Mogeta movie together?

Tohru loves and accepts everyone, making her immune to Kakeru’s more annoying qualities.

Kakeru could help Tohru explore her emotions with his blunt questions.

If the manga had gone this direction, I would have been okay with it.

HAHAHA who am I kidding? Kyo and Tohru forever.

VERDICT: SHIP IT

 

Ship 7: Rin x Momiji

 

AKA Impulsive Horse meets House Bunny

Aww, Momiji! Now you’re not forever alone!

Sadly, this is a TERRIBLE SHIP!

Rin is independent and angry.

Momiji is sunshine-bright and loves cuddles.

I doubt he has the capacity to calm Rin or handle her intensity.

And I REALLY doubt Rin wants Momiji around.

That’s a no from me.

VERDICT: R.I.P. IT

 

Ship 8: Yuki x Shigure

 

AKA Rat Prince meets a real Dog

I stand by that description.

I REALLY don’t see Shigure with anyone, let alone Yuki.

They make good pals, but I think their friendship exists in SPITE of their contrasting personalities, not because of them.

Sure, the two coexist as roommates, but too often Yuki has to keep Shigure in check.

Tohru balances out this pairing’s dynamic.

Without her, their relationship is a stagnant pool of unwashed dishes and quashed perversion.

VERDICT: R.I.P. IT

 

Ship 9: Kureno x Hatori

 

AKA The Unspeakable meets the Responsible Dragon

I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU, KURENO.

Setting aside my UTTER HATRED FOR KURENO, what do I think of this couple?

Well…it’s neither healthy nor interesting.

They’re both too distant to initiate a romance and Kureno lacks the backbone to match Hatori’s quiet determination.

And a romance where NEITHER party is expressive in the least? Kill me now.

VERDICT: R.I.P. IT

 

That means…the Forever Alone character…

…ISĀ KYO.

Furuba 3

NOOOOOO, MY BABY!!!

Then again…I believe in the Single Life.

“Single” does not constitute “lonely” or “alone.”

Let the other characters take him in.

Hell, let him stay with me! I have lots of love to give!

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Quick shout-out to my aros and grayros.

We are family, dammit.

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That was really fun. I should 100% do this with ALL of my favorite franchises.

What should be next?

Star Wars?

Lunar Chronicles?

SHOULD I MAKE A POLL!?!?

Hm…don’t think I can with the free plan.

Suggest more franchise-specific R.I.P. It or Ship Its below.

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Author:

She/her. 4w3. Lover of vegan cream cheese and performative angst. Seattle-based writer currently dabbling in socialism and progressive Christianity. I love to call out, complain, overreact, analyze, and reimagine. This site contains the fruit of that labor.

3 thoughts on “R.I.P. It or Ship It: Fruits Basket Edition

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